A little secret - I like to be in control!

       Yep, that's right! I like to be in control of my life! I like to do everything my way, in my time, through my lens. I can do it. If I can't, I'm not being good enough. Yes, this is the lie I have told myself for years! I admit it! It was in a conversation once I arrived at Covenant Presbyterian church two years ago that a parent stopped by my office to introduce herself. As she entered my office, she encountered a young lady in tears - ME! imagine that too! She encountered tears of a young lady who had realized she wasn't in control. I had faced a conversation I didn't know how to fix just moments before with a precious youth. Yet through the words of a parent just coming by to say hello - she challenged me and gave me a perspective I had been ignored before - I am not in control of anything! God is! This summer so far I have been reminded of a brief holy conversation I had with a parent her words "all that simple, yet all that hard" - "Neeley you aren't in control, God is". I have rested in that good news the past three weeks! From getting sick in Yucatan and not being able to lead to longing for lost friendships to be renewed  - I have to turn to God because God is in control of our every day, our relationships, our callings, Jesus as mediator and  Spirit as guide - God is in control! This week in Montreat at a Montreat Youth conference the theme was "Searching for a Signal". What I gained from the privilege of participating in a week of keynote, worship, conversations, song, and of course energizers - I would like to share through my journal reflections. These reflections re centered my outlook on life - like all of us need so often - that we are given this precious life to live in God's grace, with God as the light to lead the way through Jesus Christ.
Have you ever known exactly where you are yet felt so lost?
Have you ever been in the midst of community and felt alone?
What is a story of yours with the experience of being found?
"The incarnation is God's signal of God's love searching for us!"
View life not through your lens - but through the eyes of God.
What are moments in your life when the brief moment seems to last forever?
"Sometimes you have to let go of one thing to embrace another."
Discernment is faithful.
Why waste time on those things that are not "life-giving"?
"Whenever you find tears in your eyes, especially unexpected, it is well to pay closest attention - for more often that not, God is summoning where you should go next."
Evangelism is the work of telling a different story, different from the world we live in.
Always speak with Conviction!

So we are called to take time out to reflect, to discern, to remind ourselves we are not in control! Thanks be to God!

Some pics from Yucatan and Montreat!

The fearless leaders in Mexil, Yucatan - Mexico

No running water, no electricity = this is our shower!

precious children of Mexil helping us mix concrete for a roof!

Our nativity scene in Montreat!

Picnic in Montreat with Chandler!

Three of our group of 11! Yay Covenant at Montreat!

Ruach!

You may be wondering...Ruach? This means Spirit in Hebrew! Spirit meaning wind, God's presence; spirit as in Pentecost! Happy Birthday to the church TODAY! I love celebrating Pentecost! On my way to a graduation party I drove past a small church with a plethora of red and white balloons being held by precious children as they ran around the church courtyard...now that's a church birthday party! Pentecost reminds me to reflect on how God's spirit dwells amongst each of us every moment of day. I am overcome with gratitude when I feel God's spirit all around me. Whether it be in the quiet pages of my prayer journal or the music selections over the organ, I continue to be overwhelmed at the power of the Holy Spirit's presence. Or may it be a decision, a life changing situation...I continue to be overwhelmed by how the Holy Spirit shows up!

When do I feel the presence of the Holy Spirit the most: communion. Communion gets me every time!! Talk about a powerful sacrament! after church today I was telling one of my youth how every time I take communion I feel a tear gently rolling down my cheek. Here's a secret. After I dip the bread of life in the cup of life I return to my pew, pray, and then I picture in my head all the places I have broken bread and sipped of the cup with the community of God; Dahlonega Presbyterian Church around the Lord's table, Montreat in Anderson Auditorium, FPC Hartsville, Presbyterian College, Covenant, Yucatan, ARW, at the church homes of family members,  many retreats, camps, and weekend getaways! Communion invites me to remember the suffering servant leader who gives us life, who dwells with us today...the Holy Spirit.

When do I feel the presence of the Holy Spirit the most: the voices of the Lord's prayer! Another secret...when I bow my head to say the Lord's prayer I say it silently as I listen to the people around me collectively pray the Lord's prayer. As a little girl I loved hearing Daddy's voice say the Lord's prayer. Still today he reaches over and grabs my hand when we say it together in church. (Dad, bet you didn't know I listen to YOU!). And now when Robert and I worship together I love hearing him say the Lord's prayer. It is the Holy Spirit presences in the voices of the Lord's prayer that reminds me God is in control and with us every step of the way!

When do I feel the presence of the Holy Spirit the most: children's sermons! I know most people (especially people I know who serve in churches don't like the children's sermon), but goodness do I love it! God's youngest disciples gathered, eager to hear what the minister has to say, willing to shout out what they are thinking! I have never felt the Holy Spirit more in a children's sermon than at FPC Hartsville! Every Sunday morning I would look forward to sitting alongside these gifts from God to me (selfishly!) and share a biblical story with them...Holy God I know you were all around us!!!

When do I feel the presence of the Holy Spirit the most: in the experiences of every day life! the small things from day to day that cause me to stop, say a prayer of thanksgiving, and live my life as worship! So I share with you a few of my favorite things from this week...small, simple ways I saw God this week!

1. in a note from Robert. simply I love you!

2. when I open the door to our home and Bailey is waiting on me. Always excited!

3. Watching my youth at high school graduation with big smiles on their faces!
4. a sweet hug from a child
5. in using my love language of gifts...as I loaded Robert up with goodies for Duke camp

6. during Hebrew class as we read Genesis 1 in Hebrew!
7. through a parent telling their child they are proud of them!
8. by a handwritten thank you note from a youth
9. an hour of doing Montreat energizers with dear friends
10. a phone call from my sister sharing good news of a job
11. grabbing a drink with a girlfriend after a long day! a timeout from our crazy schedules!
12. planning mission trips for this summer
13. conversation with my grandmother about how God is working in our lives
14. grocery shopping with Robert and laughs we shared!
15. fresh flowers on the dining room table
16. when my calendar allowed for youth to stop by the office and I had time!
17. a Pentecost party at a church as I drove by
18. the smell of our back yard freshly cut
19. talking to a new mommy about being a mother!
20. laughter!
21. an email from a friend in Uganda!
22. my alone time with God writing in my journal! a gift from a dear friend!

Truly blessed and duly grateful for the presence of the Holy Spirit in my life! May we all recognize God's presence in our midst, in the miracle of every moment and say Thank you! Happy Pentecost!

Blessed by this Sabbath,
Neeley

Full Circle Friday Night!

My favorite time of day...the evening...6:00pm! Whether it be eating peanuts with fam on the beach/back porch of our beach home or awaiting Brian Williams on nightly news...I love evening time! Flash back 15 years and evening times were spent playing outside in the front yard...you would find four girls playing softball, kickball, performing their latest cheerleading/dance routine...these four girls would have two faithful spectators...mom and dad! Or even 15 years ago evenings were spent around the dinner table in the keeping room with fish sticks, mac and cheese, canned corn, and some fruit mother insisted on us eating!!! You see, this is why i love evening time! Robert's favorite time of day is the morning so we are learning how to celebrate our favorite parts of the the day together..both near and far! So this past friday, we did just that! We woke up and had breakfast and got to work around the house! However, my favorite part of friday besides the fact that it was just the two of us all day playing at our home, was when we went outside, lit the candles, started a fire, brought out two decks of cards, burgers on the grill, and a glass of wine! As Robert was grilling I sat there with my hebrew text book...one happy girl! So friday night full circle you may ask...yes! 15 years ago, friday nights were spent at home! At home with the fam...perhaps a local football game but mostly the family at home enjoying quality time together. This is the kind of friday night robert and I got to share!

I find it fascinating  to think about how quality time and friday night plans evolve as you travel through life! The most fascinating part....you go full circle..back to the friday night that shaped you, the friday night that molded who you are today! Cheers to many more beautiful evenings full of fireflys and full circle friday nights!!!

Robert worked on our patio!!! We enjoyed it on Friday and Saturday night!

I came home from class and not only had robert prepared a fun night but he installed new lights in the dining room! He knows I love surprises!!

Our fun weekend didn't stop on friday night! Angelo and Margaret came to Charlotte for Saturday night!!! we love them muchly!

Start of June 2011!

It's been a few months since I decided to put aside my blog...BUT after a conversation this weekend..I AM BACK! Blogging to me is a way to share, to express your thoughts, prayers, and views on life! Well, after a short sabbatical I have decided to share my process of daily discernment as much as time allows!

So where are we! I have to say these past five months of my life have been quite the journey! A journey with smooth roads, a variety of speed bumps, and forgiving pot holes! Soo how are WE!! Robert is loving GA Southern! I am continuing to serve alongside the high school youth at Covenant while tackling the joy of Hebrew! I have to admit..I like it! Studying Hebrew is allowing me to read scripture in an entire new context of the early writers of the Old Testament. By the end of this summer I hope to walk away with tools to translate and a deeper understanding of our Scriptures. All who were instrumental in me pursuing a seminary education- I can't say thank you enough! I have loved every moment!! cheers to 4 more years!

We are still enjoying two homes! Home in Charlotte and Home in Statesboro! The communities of friends we have been surrounded by during this time of commuting has been astonishingly beautiful!!!

I stopped blogging for a few months so that I could focus my thoughts in my personal prayer journal. In my journal since Feb. my reflections are centered on the little big topic of forgiveness!!! Fun and scary word!
So what is forgiveness? Why forgive? I have learned over the past year that forgiveness is something people don't like to talk about much less conquer! I was in that same boat until I challenged myself to look within myself and ask...how do I need to forgive myself? Who do I need to forgive? How do you offer authentic forgiveness or even ask for it? It has been fascinating looking all aspects of forgiveness right in the face! I have embraced old friendships and worked to make them new; I have looked myself in the mirror to see how I can better be a disciple of forgiveness; I have been able to extend forgiveness! What I have learned and strive to continue to hold dear...Forgiveness sets you free! Bob Henderson (head of staff) did a forgiveness sermon series early winter...he said through forgiveness you choose relationship! you choose hope in a joyful future over an incident! I love it and am trying to embrace forgiveness daily! Not only are we called to choose forgiveness as a Christian community but we are called to choose relationship! We are freely given the gift of faith and invited to be in relationship with our God, therefore, we have the privilege to participate in relationship with each other by the grace of God! Yesterday evening, I was on a boat ride with the fam! The breathtaking sunset, the cool GA breeze, and the joy of family, I was grinning from ear to ear with happiness! Not just surface, cheesy happy...but the type of happiness that you feel in your soul - joy - the kind of happy you want to shout out and cry at the same time because of the blessings around you! Don't get me wrong, with happiness comes some of those pot holes I mentioned earlier, but happiness that is deep and centered in our Lord is unbreakable! It is through forgiveness, relationships, and happiness that I have experienced God this past spring!

So there you have it! you are up to date!!! I pray for Hannah as she is over seas doing misison work this summer! I pray for all the hartsville, Dahlonega, and charlotte youth who have graduated or are about to graduate from high school! I feel old!! Prayers for Baby Finley, Baby Murray, and Baby Sam!!! I also pray that I will continue to be a forgiving person even when its hard...to know our God forgives and we are called to as well! Thankyou sweet Jesus for the gift of forgiveness because I have the most beautiful relationships!!!

Embracing 2011!

Life is a journey! A journey of faith! Faith is a gift from God! God loved us first! First and Foremost we are to praise God! As 2011 has gotten off to a beautiful beginning I have decided to return to the spiritual discipline of journaling.  I have discerned blogging as journaling and enjoyed sharing how I have and am experiencing God. However, I have decided to reunite with my personal journals and go back to my private journal. I have seen God's grace more than ever in the past few months and I am reflecting and praising our God for every glimpse of Heaven on earth! May you find ways to reflect and praise this day!

Blessings to you! My last blogging journal for now on "It takes two". I love you fam, friends, and you too babe!
~ one grateful servant

An 8th Grade Speech!

Hello my name is Robert Burnside. I would like to tell you about my family’s tradition of going to the beach for the fourth of July .Every year my family packs our bags with the anticipation of heading to the beach. We have been doing this for as long as I can remember and I look forward to it every year. I have so many good memories, even a few bad ones, but none the less I still love it.


Packing for our vacation is a very orderly process. Our SUV is crammed full of bags, food, buggy boards, towels, and our two dogs , Sydney and Abby. It takes us two and a half hours to make the drive to our house at Litchfield Beach. When we arrive, we are greeted by all of our cousins who come running out of the door and down the porch stairs screaming all the way. Once the adrenaline rush has died down we, quickly unload our SUV and head to the beach, where our family tradition of bochy ball, swimming in the ocean and four squares begin. One of my favorite memories is the time that our whole family played four squares until midnight! Another family favorite is covering our trampoline in liquid soap, turning on the hose, jumping and falling all over the place until someone usually gets hurt and our parents make us quit.

My family has many Fourth of July traditions. As I awake on the morning of fourth I can smell the pancakes and bacon being prepared. I head upstairs where my cousin Elie is preparing stacks of pancakes and bacon by the pound, both of which are my favorite! After I have eaten more that my share of each, I head down stairs to help prepare our golf cart for the big parade. This process takes an hour of taping streamers, flags, pinwheels and any other Fourth of July decoration you can imagine to every available spot on the golf cart. We all pile on with cups of candy to throw to the kids and bing a few adults in the head too. Our golf cart is always one of the best and we have even been in the local newspaper.

Fireworks are also a big part of our tradition. My mom and my uncle Ben are in charge of taking all of the kids to buy fireworks. We rush into the crowded fireworks store amazed by all of the different types .The largest one always catches our attention even though we know that we can’t have it. But that’s okay, because the smallest ones in the end tends to be our favorites anyway. Sparklers however are not on my favorites list anymore, and here’s why. When I was around 8 years old my cousin Edward and I had just opened our first box of sparklers. The giant sparklers seemed like a great idea at the time until we realized that they break off and you can step on the still burning remains. Unfortunately my cousin, Edward and I found this out the hard way by both stepping on the hot sparkler at the same time. As you can guess this did not feel pleasant.

One of the most memorable times I can remember is when my cousin Neeley got in engaged on the beach and all of my cousins were in on it. Each one of the cousins held up a letter which spelled out, “Will you marry me?” Of course she said yes and then we had to take 3000 pictures, which is not my favorite thing to do. It is still something I will never forget. The family talent show is always fun and each year we have to come with a new skit.

As you can tell my family is really close and traditions are very important to us. I believe it is very important to spend with your family, because friends can come and go , but family will always be there for you no matter what. Thank you for your time and hope that your family is as important to you as mine is to me.

LOVE YOU COUSIN ROBERT! THank you! I wanted to share your speech with those who read my blog! SOOO proud of you and the young man (o gosh!!!) God is creating you to be!

A Pumpkin and A Children's Sermon

Harvest Time Candles, Fire logs, glass of wine, two pumpkins, and my sister Elizabeth, makes for a beautiful fall evening!! What a treat it was to spend a Fall weekend with my sister! We laughed, we tried to remember how dad taught us to carve pumpkins, we talked about life, our hopes, our dreams...but most importantly we were just together...present with each other knowing as sisters we were side by side! We were side by side peaking through the window as we met our little sisters, Mags and Robs, on Oct. 13, 1989. We have been side by side cheering, dancing, trying to tumble, teaching vacation bible school, getting on mom and dads nerves, and side by side through the good and bad of life's journey and of course she was by my side the day Robert and me said our wedding vows! This past weekend we found ourselves side by side as Bubs and I made our way through a corn maze and photographed Bailey with our pumpkins during our sister weekend!
On Sunday, Reformation Sunday/All Saints Day Bubba and I, side by side, sat in worship together at Covenant Presbyterian Church. This past Sunday I gave the children's sermon as I shared a cross that Gramps (Dad's dad) once wore and a picture of my Great Grandmother Kathleen Neeley (the only one I have of her holding me). I told the children gathered that Gramps and my Great Grandmother were part of the communion of saints that were part of the past of the church who taught us of God's love and grace. Then I invited the boys and girls to look in a bag at a very special saint...when they looked inside they saw their reflection (Mom, a mirror was in the bag!!). I reminded them that they are specials saints of God too, they can be a saint today! As I returned to my pew after sharing a piece of my story through Gramps' cross and a picture of my great grandmother (my saints),...members of the congregation were invited to come up front to place a flower in the vase as they remembered saints who entered the church triumphant this past year. Once again, side by side, Elizabeth and I placed a flower in the vase as we prayed a prayer of thanksgiving for Mr. Guy (our grandfather), and other family members and friends who are the saints we remember this day.
So a pumpkin and a childrens sermon... side by side with my sister this weekend was a reminder of God's grace and love through the face of Christ shining through Elizabeth Jean Rentz, my beloved sister!